I usually don’t get too excited over videos on youtube, but this shit is too funny not to post, and if you have about five minutes of your life to throw away you should watch them. There are two videos, but you have to watch the haircut one first, or the second one won’t be nearly as funny, even though its funnier than the first one.
But anyways, enjoy bitch nuggets!!! Jagerbomb! Jagerbomb! Jagerbomb!!!
Then this is THE video for you!!! Paris Hilton can be seen exiting a SUV then immediately falling down to the ground. My guess is she probably tripped over her balls.
And I am sorry for posting TWO Paris videos today, but if you run your virus check, I *think* your computer will be okay.
Seriously, WTF is in the water that the celebs are drinking??? They are getting pregnant left and right, like it ain’t no thang.
The latest celeb to join the crew of pregnant stars is Pamela Anderson, who is currently going forward with a divorce to hubby Rick Salomon after just a few months of marriage. Rick Salomon, aka the guy that is crushing Paris Hilton’s vag in her sex tape, is still hoping things will work out with the divorce/pregnancy:
Salomon has told friends he believes she is “acting crazy” because of the pregnancy and hopes she will settle back into the marriage. Interestingly, in her divorce petition, Anderson asked for spousal support but not child support.
No offense to both parties involved, but this is going to be one hella skanky baby. And you like what I did there, didn’t you? I said no offense, so I can say whatever I want to about this future whorish child. Like, being birthed through Pam Anderson’s vagina is more hazardous than eating a turkey stuffed with pinless grenades and cyanide.
p.s. I know this picture has nothing to do with her being pregnant, but how funny is it that it looks like she about to give Rick dome on a porch while a dog goes poo in the foreground????
Paris Hilton was spotted out walking the streets looking like a deranged lady of the night after going to Hollywood hot spot Hyde while trying to hide her black eye. Which I would like to say was given by me while trying to knock this bitches two brain cells closer together.
Unfortunately I was not responsible, and while no one is taking claim for putting the smack down on her, its probably a mushroom stamp from one of her cohorts with random pizza guys.
And if she did actually get punched in the dome, I vote we nominate the puncher for a medal of honor, and make a national holiday of their birthday.
p.s. I really like the fake ass look of those blue contacts, it makes her seem so natural!
According to NBC via the London Daily Mail, BITCHney was not too happy last week when Paris tried to steal the limelight away from her at her birthday, and it has caused a massive fallout between the two. LDM reports:
London’s Daily Mail newspaper has been alerted to a letter Spears’ camp has sent to Hilton, demanding The Simple Life star stops being rude to Britney and members of her entourage.
They reportedly threatened to leak the footage, which shows Hilton in a compromising position with another woman, unless her attitude changes.
A source says, “The letter warns Paris that if she continues being rude to people, the footage will be leaked online.”
Australia’s Sydney Daily Telegraph reports the former friends fell out at Spears’ 26th birthday parties in Hollywood last weekend.
But a source close to Hilton tells the Mail, “It’s obvious Britney and her bratty pals are being silly. Paris laughed when she got the letter and said it was c**p.”
So it’s crap she says? Probably just like this is completely crap and never happened either, warning NSFW image of Paris making out topless with some other girl:
Which I totally don’t care about her sexual preference or what she does, even though its sad to say the low rates of STD’s among lesbians wont stay that way for much longer if Paris keeps hooking up with them, but its just annoying that she does what only a dumb slut would do and acts like a goody two shoes twit, and denies things that there is pictorial proof of.
Locked in the basement and fed through a small opening in the door! It’s not even the fact that he is all gothic either, it’s just he seriously looks like he wants to start murdering people.
And wtf, does being a goth render your smile useless? It’s like if you decide to dress so gloomy, at least try to put a freaking smile on your over powdered cake face.
And if you don’t know who I am talking about, that probably means you are over the age of 13 and don’t have a daughter, because apparently, they are the new “Hanson” of their time. One of them, the main one I think, seems to be a little….how do I put this nicely….a little bit more dumb than the others because apparently he has problems walking over crushed glass, though I am sure its probably one of the easiest things to do, other than just walk. But yeah, he trips/slips and falls to his knees and plays it off pretty quickly, but thankfully it was captured on video to be watched and rewatched a million times, because, laughing at people falling never gets old.
Its just a couple of seconds into the video, after you see hordes of prepubescent girls running toward the stage in a frightening debacle.
Fabio and George Clooney happened to be seated next to each other at the same restaurant over the weekend, where things were all good until Fabio and his group of female companions began taking pictures, prompting Clooney, who was there with his girlfriend, to whine and ask them not to be taking pictures, which did not go to well, Page Six reports:
According to numerous eyewitnesses, Clooney, assuming the woman was taking snaps of him, asked her to stop - prompting Fabio to explain that the shots were of his group, not Clooney, and to tell the superstar, “Stop being a diva.” Clooney started arguing back, and he and Fabio then got into a shoving match. “The waiters broke it up before it got out of hand,” a witness told In Touch.
“George was drinking . . . He wasn’t drunk, but he certainly wasn’t stone sober, either.” Fabio’s manager told the magazine, “George is lucky he didn’t end up in the ER.”
I think George Clooney needs to take Fabio’s advice, and stop acting like a little bitch. I know I would tell his bitch ass to mind his own business, because it sounds to me, he was putting his haughty little nose into places it didn’t belong. So yah, I am gonna end this one with a GTFO of here George Clooney with this whiny baby BS, and yes, Fabio can totally kick your ass.
As you can obviously see from the pictures, Kidman was working the red carpet this weekend in a see through dress. Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, see managed to keep her real goodies hidden. But you would think after this many years on the red carpets, this bitch would have figured out clothes can become see through when a camera flash hits them! And besides being transparent, the dress was pretty cute, so I am not gonna hate on her to much.
In the bargain bin at Walmart, that is! Repo: The Genetic Opera honestly looks like the biggest piece of poop called a movie ever, and basically all they did was combine Hostel and The Sound of Music, threw in Paris Hilton and made the leap between being a shitty horror movie to a REALLY shitty whore-er movie.
Kudos to BITCHney, because, on this shitty, cold, rainy day she made me laugh by dancing in her backyard, with her new collagen lips and a cigarette in her bikini. Long Live BITCHney.
Oh and anyone who wants to buy me those sunglasses, feel free, because those bitches are the BOMB!!!
And to those thinking Spears is looking too hot, click here to be brought back to reality!
As BITCHney was leaving a Beverly Hills medical building complex yesterday, where TMZ reports that she got her lips “plumped” and was driving with only one hand while her other hand was hiding her new duck lips, she tried to make a left turn and drove over the foot of a TMZ photographer. Which is kind of hilarious because she JUST had settled her hit and run case that day. And how did BITCHney react?? Probably how I would have! TMZ reports:
Spears looked shocked once she realized what she’d done … but didn’t get out of the car to see if he was okay.
But I don’t feel bad for the photog at all. FFS, you learn when you are like 2 not to try and stand in front of a moving car. I mean, wtf is she suppose to do, just wait until she goes blind from their flashbulbs to continue to drive? Maybe I am just a road raging BITCH, but I would be slapping these people for even get that close to my car.
UPDATE: Apparently BITCHney has NOT settled her hit and run yet, but its 100% she has had her lips done!
This model BITCH falls straight through a hole in the runway that was put there, accidentally, by performers during their show. I would cry. And totally kick that guys ass for breaking the floor with his back.
You might remember a story I did where I called Kelly Osbourne a bobble headed bitch, but had I known this picture was coming, I would have saved that insult because I can’t think of anything better now. It just doesn’t make sense for a head to grow at this rate, has she moved from snorting coke to snorting helium???
What Brooke Hogan is wearing is just UNACCEPTABLE! Where the f do you even get stuff like this? She looks like a pirate hooker, on steroids, with bad weave and VERY hard nipples. I try extra hard to like her, just because she seems nice, but this outfit is where I draw the line. I cannot support shit like this, its just terrible.
The only place on earth where this would be acceptable is……in a STRIP CLUB!
Paris Hilton appeared on David Letterman, and it’s pretty safe to say things did not go well for her. The entire time she is on, he reams with her embarrassing questions and barely hidden insults about her time in jail. He doesn’t even allow her to plug her new movie or perfume and would immediately change the subject back to her jail time . Even when she got uncomfortable, he pressed on, mocking her the entire time with the crowd laughing in the background. In fact, watching it you can almost begin to feel bad for her. But not really, because then you realize it’s Paris Hilton, and she shouldn’t be on your tv anyway.
Make sure to pay attention to that bathroom rug on her head she calls hair, its very un-becoming to say the least. And try not to laugh to hard when she starts pouting and kicking her leg while trying to figure out how to change the subject.
So yeah, Oktoberfest goes down every year in Germany, and basically the goal is to get as wasted as possible and be a drunken mess, but even drunken messes have their limit, and the one thing that they don’t want is a cheap whore that drinks canned wine. Cheap whore being synonymous with Paris Hilton that is. E! Online reports:
Munich locals complained that their annual bender was “selling out” by having celebs shill during the big swill. But probably the key reason for banning Paris was that last year she was pimping her own brand of canned wine. For Bavarian beer snobs, canned beer is blasphemy, canned wine an abomination.
But really, lets take a second and look at what Paris accomplished, because getting banned from Oktoberfest would be like getting banned from Mardi Gras, it just don’t happen, especially when you are a blonde bitch who likes to get naked and flash their cash and prizes to anyone with a camera.
Welcome to the Head Bitch, a hollywood celebrity blog specializing in providing the latest news and gossip, and proving who the top bitch really is while making these celebitches cry.
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