Unfortunately, it wasn’t for charity, it was for her latest loser boyfriend, Benji Madden, who was having a “concert” there. I use that term loosely, because, I refuse to believe that douche is in a band that could actually be getting paid to make money. But anyways, Paris Hilton did manage to hand out pics of herself, and autograph them, which sounds like the Hilton fame monger we know. What even sounds more like the Parisite that we know, is her lack of knowledge of Africa, and its many countries which she displayed when asked about Africa:
I love Africa in general - South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries.”
Like, I know the dumb bitch is a high school dropout, but when is the last time YOU have heard of anyone talking about the country West Africa??? My guess is going to be never, considering it DOESN”T EXIST!   But since the dumbass likes it so much, maybe her and her douchey boyfriend could go get lost there!
You might remember Nick Hogan almost killing his friend, John Graziano, in a street racing accident, which has left his friend in a hospital for months now, and resulted in having part of his freaking brain removed, as well as Nick gathering several criminal charges, including a minor driving under the inlfuence:
The suit will seek damages in the millions, said attorney George Tragos, but the exact amount is not known because it remains unclear how expensive Graziano’s care will be. Tragos said the former Marine’s medical bills already exceed $1 million. Lawyers today said that a portion of Graziano’s frontal lobe had to be removed because of the crash. He is in a “semi-conscious” state and responds to certain stimuli like heat and touch, lawyers said.
And you know what I have to say about this??? HAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA HA HA! Thats what happens when rich parents let their douchebag kids drive around in Vipers and call themselves “racers”. And its not that I dislike the Hogans, I watch that stupid effing show every week when its on, but this is a lesson to parents everywhere, and a lesson to dumbass boys who think they are hotshit in their little souped up cars. Plus stunt 101ing like that is so fucking lame now, now its all about driving luxury cars and having NICE shit, instead of a viper covered in pathetic racing company stickers.
I have really been avoiding stories on this dumb slut, because, well, she isn’t really famous for anything other than bad porns and even worse movies. But this week she tried to pull a stunt where she pretended to be walking around hollywood with a shaman, and “gave” a diamond necklace away to a stranger under his direction, and commented on how he “changed her life”. TMZ, however, quickly reported the shaman was a FAKE! Well, actually, he is an actor, who has been in POTC and other movies that I am to lazy to go look up.
Anyways, with a little more investigation, it came out that the whole thing is a sham put on for a new Ashton Kutcher show that is suppose to punk the paparazzi and media outlets. But, considering the media figured out the truth, before the show even stood a chance, I would have to say it completely FAILS!
Plus, they fucked up big time by trying to get the P-Herp-Hizzle to “act” religious and kind, because, we all know that:
a) da bitch cant act
b) this money hording whore would NEVER give away a diamond necklace she bought with her grandpa’s hard earned money!
On the real though, heres to hoping this bitch chokes on a truffle or something!
Just like I, and anyone else with a brain, predicted, Paris Hilton’s latest movie was a box office bomb. Fantasy Moguls has the direct breakdown of numbers:
The final count will show that the critically reviled comedy featuring the seemingly talentless Hilton has sold a meager $25,500 in tickets at 111 locations over the weekend. That’s only $230 per screen for theaters that were convinced to book this disaster. That means that, based on an $8 average ticket price, 29 paying customers showed up at each location over the 3-day period.
LMFAO at this dumb bitch really trying to be a movie star. She needs to stick to what she knows works for her: PORN! Its the fall back career of many actress/models and since she isn’t really either of those, I think its time she gets back on the grind (literally) in the porn business.
Yup. Thats right. At HARVARD. But fortunately, I think those kids are too smart not to be doing this as a backhand compliment and are really going to mock her. And just for fun, here are some other peoples classic responses to this:
 I’d rather see the Green River Killer honored than this whore. Or Hitler. Or the Devil. At least they had some initiative, some oomph and “can do” spirit.
Awww!
This has got to be a joke award that she paid to get. The title of her “movie” should be, “Dumber, Dumberer, and Sluttier”. Piss on harvard for letting the STD ridden, lazy eyed, gapping cooze bimbo step on campus.
harvard is the new yale
haha nah the best part is that she prolly a) has no clue what lampoon means and b) thinks this is a serious award
Harvard Lampoon Magazine is ‘awarding’ her Woman of the Year… Word:lampoon Function: noun a harsh satire usually directed against an individual
Guess I am not the only one who thinks she is a useless twat. And who else bets this is the closest that Paris will come to getting educated ever in her life?
Okay, I can’t even begin to explain how bored I am by this story, so bear with me. Bitchney was suppose to be in court today, even though its not required, to try and prove why she should have visitation rights and explain her crazy ass behavior for the past months. But, in a true mother of the year move, she has been a no show. She still has some time to show up to second session after lunch, and she just left her house within the last few minutes, but it is unknown if she is going to the courtroom or to get a bunch of burritos and cigarettes.
Right now, due to her failure to return her children at the end of a visit and holding them hostage for four hours in her house, she has no custody rights at all.
On the upside of things, she can now wear mini shorts and not induce vomiting.
UPDATE 1: She has shown up to court, but has not yet taken the stand. Only one of supposed 7 witnesses has testified, and is likely to carry on until tomorrow.
UPDATE 2: BITCHney has left the building!!! After driving around in circles, and getting out of her car, she quickly left again. Will she be back??? I dunno, but I will keep you updated with the madness.
Okay now. This video is pissing me off and starting my day off all wrong. Ms. Bitchney herself can be seen smoking a cigarette inside her car at a gas station, which seems to be one of her favorite pastimes. But to top it all off nicely, she decides to throw the lit ciggie on the ground. Because, you know, cigarettes and spilled gasoline go together real well.
When her mentally challenged behavior is putting herself at danger that is one thing, risking to blow up a gas station is a whole other thing.
Update:Â Apparently some a-hole didn’t want anyone using their video, so just imagine a monkey in a wig smoking ciggies and dancing by a barrel of gasoline.
Paris Hilton was spotted out walking the streets looking like a deranged lady of the night after going to Hollywood hot spot Hyde while trying to hide her black eye. Which I would like to say was given by me while trying to knock this bitches two brain cells closer together.
Unfortunately I was not responsible, and while no one is taking claim for putting the smack down on her, its probably a mushroom stamp from one of her cohorts with random pizza guys.
And if she did actually get punched in the dome, I vote we nominate the puncher for a medal of honor, and make a national holiday of their birthday.
p.s. I really like the fake ass look of those blue contacts, it makes her seem so natural!
Jamie Lynn Spears was seen leaving an education center, and apparently she is going to be getting her GED, which sucks because now we won’t be seeing any pregnant prom pictures, which would be instant classics. And perhaps out of irony, or just plain meanness Us magazine asked the star little idiot what she would be studying, and lets just say her hopes are astoundingly high:
“I haven’t thought anything about what I might study,” she has said. “I’ll have to look more into that. But if I went anywhere, I think it would be fun to go to LSU.”
Bitch please! The only thing you are going to be studying is how to smell out a stinky diaper and wipe spit up off your sweaters at the same time.
I had hopes for this Spearling, who is only 16, even though my hopes consisted of her not getting knocked up and going insane like her sister, but those all got flushed down the drain with the OK! magazine exclusive cover, featuring a puppy eyed picture of Jamie Lynn with the title “I’m Pregnant!”. And her winner boyfriend has already found the time to update his myspace profile with the headline “Me and Jamie are over….. :(”, which pretty much completely contradicts all the rumors that the Spears have been spreading that they have been together for a while and that they were thinking of getting married. But since myspace is not the end all for legit breaking news stories, maybe they are still together and can have a wedding with Jamie Lynn aka Layme Lynn can have a honky tonk teenage wedding!
And whats even funnier, is that not too long ago she sued the National Enquirer for reporting that she was pregnant, and now National Enquirer is mass mailing the nasty email sent to them from the Spears camp talking about how morally upright she is, and its really perhaps one of the funniest mass emailing I have seen in awhile:
“Ms. Spears is a devout Christian with a spotless reputation, who lives in accordance with the highest moral and ethical standards in accordance with her faith.
There is no “rumor concerning Ms. Spears’ (non-existent) pregnancy, except perhaps for the baseless rumor just now being created by the National Enquirer.
Ms. Spears is not pregnant. It is pathetic for the National Enquirer to attempt to create a wholly baseless rumor that Ms. Spears is pregnant, so it can run a malicious story and false story which would be emotionally devastating to a morally upright 16 year old girl.”
And now time to laugh:
AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA…..breath…..AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAat this dumb bitch getting knocked up just like her sister!!!!
p.s. how many of you think she is doing this for attention??? She wants to be in the tabloids just like her Superstah Sistah!
Am I right, or am I right bitch nuggets??? I said just a few days ago, that Paris Hilton was so desperate for attention that she would be flashing the papz soon, and low and behold, the bitch strikes with a pantyless pantyhose shot!
And can someone please explain to me why she is wearing this outfit in the first place? It’s damn near December, so why are we still seeing close up shots of this smelly hookers ass? Because I don’t give a fuck who you are, if you walk and your dress accidentally rides up to show your entire ass, maybe you should put something else on. Or if you are a giant like Hilton, shrinking 30 inches.
The sad part is, she is such a useless bitch that its not even sexy. But the scariest part of the whole thing is the fact the bitch has a mic in her hand, which means she probably was singing, which means her hopes of being a singer haven’t died yet, which is just unfortunate for the world.
That last week I was super freaking busy with school and couldn’t find time to post! But you can relax now my bitch nuggets because I am back, and will be catching you up with all the gossip that we missed, plus all the new shit happening right now!
We all knew things had been going too smoothly for BITCHney the last couple of days, but don’t fret! The mayhem in her life is back and she is effing up as usual! TMZ reports:
“We’ve learned Brit did not provide the drug testing people with contact information so they could reach her to facilitate the random tests, and that is what triggered Commish Gordon’s action.â€
Hmmm….I wonder…WHY would Spears not want to have random drug testings done????
BECAUSE THE BITCH CAN ONLY STAY SOBER FOR A DRUG TEST FOR A FEW DAYS AT A TIME!
Because I am really sure the people of Rwanda would love climate controlled pet carriers and Marilyn Monroe glasses! The bitch could sell that gigantic rock on her scrawny ass finger and feed a small country for a week or two, but dammit y’all, you know a girl has just got to have her 60+carats!!
And in other Paris Hilton news, rumors are flying about her possibly playing the role of Lucy Ewing in the remake of the old tv series Dallas, Ok! Magazine reports:
“In her mind she’s already part of American royalty by being a Hilton,” explains the source. “So she thinks it will be perfect casting. She’s actually surprised the producers haven’t thought of this themselves!â€
But the thing is, the role has supposedly been given to an unknown, young actress named Katie Cassidy! Lets hope to god she doesn’t sleep with the casting director and show up in another movie because I don’t think my DVD player can handle another one of her movies, its STILL recovering from its bout with herpes!
Most of the people I write about I generally like. NOT Paris Hilton. She is a bitch. And not the good kind either, she is the money hungry, fame seeking, rabid STD whore type of bitch. Why all this hate you ask? Well I am sure you remember the Rwanda trip she was going to go on (I am glad people like to talk about the good deeds they have YET to complete) but now she has taken it a step further, and is making it into a TV show that she hopes to sell under the title “The Philanthropist”, because, you know, its not worth doing charity unless you get good publicity and money out of it. And the humanitarian herself, Paris Hilton had this to say about it:
“I love having everything documented. It shows people what everyday life is like for me, how hard I work. There are a lot of misconceptions about me.”
Misconceptions???? BITCH we have seen all your “documenting” and all it consist of is you taking it from guys, getting naked or doing coke, often all at once. So the only misconception I see is the fact you can’t realize you are a nasty, fame-greedy bitch. And I just love how she is dumb enough to think that one trip with an organization makes her a do-gooder.
Paris Hilton is getting old, and desperate from the looks of these pics. Actually, she is not even Paris Hilton anymore, she is a joke of a joke, of a joke of herself. And while I do agree its sexist and wrong that its against the law for women to walk around without a shirt on, I think women who would choose to go topless would probably be attention whores, or just whores, and Paris just so happens to be both.
NSFW image of Paris Hilton impersonating Billy Joel and showing off her nipples after jump!
I don’t know about you but I am a sucker for daytime court shows, and Judge Mathis just happens to be absolute favorite, and now some BITCH is trying to sue him! The woman, Melody Burnham, had appeared on his show before, and said it took her over a year to realize it is not a “real” court of law. Which is funny, because, I don’t know how many “real” courts would have a studio audience, cameras, a dressing room and would fly litigants out of a jurisdiction and halfway across the country. The dumb BITCH also alleges she was held hostage for 6 hours in a dressing room, and she didn’t know that she was being counter-sued until moments before going before Judge Mathis. She also complained that he ridiculed her for being a honky when he laughed at pictures showing her washing machine on her porch and concluding with “I am sending you hillbillies back to the hills!”.
Mathis’ camp has already issued statements saying this lawsuit is without merit and they have very careful legal procedures which they follow.
But honestly, how much of a dumb bitch do you have to be to think court tv is the “real” thing??? It would be like thinking wrestling, unicorns and a sober Lindsay Lohan were all real!
Paris Hilton appeared on David Letterman, and it’s pretty safe to say things did not go well for her. The entire time she is on, he reams with her embarrassing questions and barely hidden insults about her time in jail. He doesn’t even allow her to plug her new movie or perfume and would immediately change the subject back to her jail time . Even when she got uncomfortable, he pressed on, mocking her the entire time with the crowd laughing in the background. In fact, watching it you can almost begin to feel bad for her. But not really, because then you realize it’s Paris Hilton, and she shouldn’t be on your tv anyway.
Make sure to pay attention to that bathroom rug on her head she calls hair, its very un-becoming to say the least. And try not to laugh to hard when she starts pouting and kicking her leg while trying to figure out how to change the subject.
So Sienna Miller had pictures leak online from the set of her new movie, and the first thing to note about these pictures is that she is naked. The second thing to note would be the fact that she is PISSED that her scene wasn’t more protected and that pictures got out on the internet, and now she doesn’t even want to film her other naked scenes. My thing is, whats to be pissed about??? Wouldn’t we have all seen this in the movie anyways? If you don’t mind be recorded on a camera naked, then why are you gonna get pissed when the whole world sees still frames of your too bony back, mediocre ta-ta’s and your kinda flat butt?
Welcome to the Head Bitch, a hollywood celebrity blog specializing in providing the latest news and gossip, and proving who the top bitch really is while making these celebitches cry.
