Wow, this picture really takes the cake in things I see that I wish I could unsee, but its a typical Paris photo. And as concerned as I am for my eyes, I am even more worried about what happened to those bathing suit bottoms! They need to be disposed of properly, if Al Qaeda got a hold of those they could be starting a WMD program of unheard proportions!!! They could detonate them and give the entire eastern hemisphere a case of snatch herpes! BRING IN THE TROOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!
And spreads her legs like always!!!! The thing you don’t know about these pictures of her in the ocean is that she was actually skiing, and Paris being the fabulous BITCH that she is doesn’t need skis. Why you ask??? Because of her size 30 feet! If anything in this world is hot, its BITCHES with feet bigger than Shaquille O’neal.
And might I add that I can tell this BITCH has really changed, just look at the loads of charitable work and donations she has made since being released! Oh…wait…she hasn’t done any of that shit!!!
p.s. I really, really like the diaper she puts on over her bikini in the last pics, its going to be the hottest trend of the summer, I just know it!!!
Wow, after watching that interview last night I am surprised I still have brain cells that are choosing to operate. I know it HAD to be Larry Kings low point in life, and I couldn’t help but laugh when they would show the upcoming Thursday show, which features Colin Powell with the title of “The state of the US and world”, which is much better suited for Larry King programming. Its hilarious to me that they would even invite her on the show, and you think with 23 days to prepare Hilton would have something smart to say, but nope, nothing. In fact I only heard LIES and dumb shit. Like when asked about what she disliked the most about herself and she answered “When I am nervous my voice gets really high.” Thats deep, REALLY deep, and honest to god she said it with a straight face. I think that alone is a testament to how much the BITCH has changed. When asked if she has ever used drugs or been addicted to drugs, she said no of course, but we all know thats a lie, as you can see in these lovely videos:
What I dont understand is why Larry let her get away with so much…like when she denied doing drugs, why didn’t he just play these videos? I mean, its not like I have exclusive rights to these, they are pretty much all over the freaking internet. I would like to think Larry knew this interview was a gimmick and didn’t put to much into it, but come on, the guy kept saying ADT instead of ADD. And I almost choked on a taquito when I heard her say that her favorite subject is creative writing, since she is a drop out and her heiress book says intelligent things like “never wake up before 10″, and her notes from jail sounded like a bad philosophy paper by a third grader who thinks philosophy is a company owned by Pillsbury. With written work like that though, the BITCH might just be our modern day Dr. Seuss!!!
If you have some extra time and would like some good laughs I have the entire Larry King show with Paris after the jump! (more…)
I might be a little bit late on this one, but I definitely just found out about it like 2 seconds ago. Tonight, as most of the world knows, Paris Hilton will be on Larry King Live to talk about her rough 23 day stay in jail, but what some of us are just now finding out is that old toad Larry King bumped Michael Moore from his show to fit in the the drunk driving BITCH. Shit like this pisses me off because Larry King use to have standards, and now all he cares about is ratings. Its a joke to replace Michael Moore, who was there to promote his movie about the shitty state of the US healthcare system, with a slutty bimbo who had to spend a measly 23 days in jail. I thought this show was suppose to talk about the NEWS, not what spoiled little BITCHES go through when they dont have their lipstick or Jimmy Choos for a week. What thought process did the people at the show go through when deciding to do this? The only way they could have picked Paris over Michael Moore is if they chose based on number of sexual partners or open herpes wounds.
This is a cruel joke, and everyone should write in to Larry saying just that!!! Michael Moore is talking about things that can help MILLIONS of people, and Paris is just going to talk about herself and how much she changed…..which is all a big freaking joke as well.
Us Magazine is reporting that their magazine will contain absolutely no trace of Paris Hilton whatsoever this week, which means no post jail interviews or pictures. Us Magazine weekly editor Janice Min had this to say about the magazines decision to ban Paris from their pages, from the AP:
“When it came down to it, the staff and I felt what I believe a lot of people in America are feeling. Which is just enormous Paris fatigue,†US Weekly editor Janice Min told The Associated Press on Tuesday.
Min expects her magazine will do just fine without her. Hilton, she said, has become such a mainstream media staple “that in many ways her time with US Weekly has moved on.”
She also added that if Paris got knocked up she would be back to the main cover, so basically, she admitted they are sellouts and they are using the lack of Paris Hilton to generate publicity, which is kind of still using her to sell magazines. Whatever their reasoning, lets hope this trend catches on worldwide.
Yay! The world can rejoice once more! Paris Hilton has been freed, and all the worlds problems are solved! Now what are the news stations going to report??? Hopefully some freaking real news! And as much as I wanted her to come out of jail with an even wonkier eye and a mustache, that didn’t happen. We did get to see her with her brown eyes and no make up though, and really, its a look she should consider, it takes at least 10 years off the BITCH! It freaks me out that she has brown eyes, but ALWAYS wears blue contacts, I just want to tell her the days of Hitler are over, and she doesn’t need to dye her hair blonde and wear blue contacts to prove she is an Aryan baby.
Its also being reported that she lost ten pounds while in jail, and upon hearing that news Nicole Richie has asked her judge for a mandatory jail sentence that only lets her leave once she has dropped another 10 herself!
With just about half a day keeping her from the real world, it looks like the heiress may be coming home to a mess! Hilarious vandals tagged a wall in front of her house with “Parisexposed.com” (just in case you BITCH nuggets cant figure out what the graffiti says) which is better knowns as the site that put up all her personal shit that she left in an unpaid storage unit. At the site you can see awesome things like her herpes prescription, sex tapes, a guy covered in blow, Paris Hilton hooking up with fellow incarcerate and Girls Gone Wild owner Joe Francis. Or you can just see it here for free!
I know I give the rich BITCH a lot of grief, but only deservedly so! However, during part of the interview she did with Ryan Seacrest, which is being released ever so slowly so they can make more money off it, she DID say something SMART! Yes you read that correctly. Paris Hilton actually said something SMART! I swear it! And here is the proof from US magazine:
Hilton tells Seacrest that she hopes to build a “transitional home” to help women when they are released from jail. “These women just keep coming back because they have no place to go,” she explains.
Hilton says the home can be “a place to get food and clothes on their backs,” continuing that the recidivism rate is “a really bad cycle and if we stop it now, we can make our community a better place.”
There might be transitions in Hilton’s future as well, as she tells Seacrest she’s ready start fresh. “I appreciate everything now and I think there was a lot of bad people that I was around and I don’t want to surround myself with those types of people anymore.”
I really hope the BITCH does this, because it is a very good thing, and could actually help some people who are a lot less privileged than the heiress. IF, and I say IF because I won’t believe it till I see it, she does this, I hope she takes it seriously and its not just something she starts and we never hear her talk about it again, then when we do its a dilapidated crack house thats filing bankruptcy. I know pictures will eventually emerge of Paris there, snorting coke of a parolee and giving lap dances to the newly released, because thats just how the BITCH does things!
With rumored interviewdeals gone awry, Paris has moved forward and secured her first televised interview since her stint in jail with none other than Larry King, the news toad! She will be on for the full hour of “Larry King Live” this Wednesday night, and Monday night her lawyer and an official from LA County’s Sheriff Department will make an appearance on the show.
I cant wait to see what this BITCH has to say!!!
Uncensored pic of Hilton and her “mic” after the jump!
It was reported earlier this week that rich BITCH Paris Hilton would be getting a cool $1 mil for doing her first televised interview out of the pokey with NBC. TMZ reported that the news station had already started briefing employees, even giving the interview a not so secret code name of “Rome”. Now, the story is changing! I guess NBC was embarrassed over the bad publicity of giving her a mil, especially since they have a policy of not paying for interviews!
Either way, I bet someone is gonna get fired over this!! I mean, what idiot was authorizing a million dollar transaction to interview Paris??? NBC needs to get with it, because everyone knows Paris gives it ALL up for free!
Even though she isn’t getting releases until this Tuesday/Wednesday she is already hitting the media circuit and talking about her jail stint. Ryan Seacrest at the opportunity to interview her via phone from the big house:
On gaining new perspective:
“I’m so much more grateful for everything that I have, even just to have a pillow at night or food. You know, my gratitude has gone up so much.” On her place in the media:
“I just realize that the media used me to make fun of and be mean about it…[I am] frankly sick of it and I want to use my fame in a good way.”
On the difficulty of visits in jail:
“I am behind glass and I want to give my dad a big hug and they won’t even let me do that. That’s how the rules are, you have to be behind glass. I’m not a criminal, I’m not dangerous, so it makes me feel like that. It’s hard but I’m stronger everyday.”
Don’t tell me she was shocked to find out that the media was making fun of her, because thats been going on for years. Maybe when the BITCH does something successful, and useful, at the same time people will start to change their minds, but I am not banking on that happening anytime soon. I dont even know if I want to start in on the “I’m not a criminal, I’m not dangerous” comment, but I guess I will…Does the BITCH really think everyone in jail is a true criminal??? A lot of people in there are locked up for dumb shit, like missing a court date for a speeding ticket. And the BITCH was sure as hell dangerous when she was driving down the road in a sports car drunk!!!!
NBC will reportedly be paying $1 million to secure the first interview Paris Hilton does once she is free. And I am not a genius or anything, but paying $1mil for a drunk driving porn star seems like a rip off. I am sure they could of got Tera Patrick for a lot less and with a lot more benefits. The only difference between the two is that Tera Patrick publicly markets her sex tapes, Paris pretends they are stolen! Also, I heard she can’t be in the Porn Star Pro Circuit because of her little disorder that rhymes with schmerpes.
With so much free time on her hands, Paris Hilton is now writing letters back to fans in response to the flood of mail she has gotten at the jail, and E! just so happened to obtain one. Warning, with each sentence you read of this letter you risk severe and permanent brain damage!!
It looks as if she put a lot of thought into her jail stay, saying that she is sad and alone. Once again, Paris Hilton takes the “NO SHIT!” moment of the day with that one. I like how her handwriting looks like something a 1st grader would struggle to scribble out, I guess that is the benefit of being a drop out, you never had to learn to write(or learn how to spell receiving)! I also love how her signature looks so planned out with the swooping designs and heart dots, because, thats just how mature 26 year olds sign their name and look extra cool at the same time.
We have heard complaints from Cameron Diaz about the paparazzi circling the Hilton home, but now more neighbors are joining in on the anti-Paris campaign and asking that the star leave their once quite neighborhood and give them some peace! This flyer has been passed around to the neighbors, and legal counsel is being sought:
The BITCH’s neighbors even hate her, but talk about kicking a dog(or BITCH) when they are down! I would feel bad for most people, but since Paris Hilton doesn’t have a soul it’s just plain funny! I wonder if moving houses is going to cause a delay in the post lockup bash thats being planned in Vegas? I hope not because I can’t wait to see this BITCH partying and up to her old tricks again!! And by tricks, I mean turning tricks….for free…on defenseless people.
Earlier this week Paris Hilton was officially let go from her talent agency, and most people just thought they had had enough with the wild heiress and the negative publicity she garnered. However, OK! Magazine is reporting that Jessica Alba was the genius mastermind behind the firing of the troubled socialite:
“They were getting a lot of pressure from bigger clients to get rid of Paris,†an insider reveals exclusively to OK!. “None of them wanted to have the same agents as Paris; she’s an embarrassment to any real artist.â€
And, according to the insider, it was Jessica Alba who tipped the scales against the hotel heiress. “Jessica is the anti-Paris — a real star who hates the silly L.A. party scene that Paris reigns over,†explains the source. “She made it clear to the folks at Endeavor — either Paris goes or she goes.â€
Usually Jessica Alba is kind of a boring BITCH, so this is out of character, but I love it!! I knew she had some inner BITCH in her!
Last night Paris Hilton was transferred out of the Medical ward at the Twin Towers Jail back to Lynwood, where she spent her first couple of days before her short lived release. I guess she either got so medicated she forgot to keep acting crazy to stay there, or they have decided to wrap her in saran wrap so her herpes dont pose a risk of contaminating the jail and all within!
According to sources within the jail, Paris Hilton was not to happy when she had to be recuffed and transferred to the place where she reportedly almost suffered a nervous breakdown, saying:
“To describe Paris as emotionally upset would be an understatement.”
TMZ is already predicting that the heiress will soon be back at the medical unit:
But our source is doubtful and says she “will not be able to handle” the cell she was in before. We’re told the root of the problem is severe panic attacks.
That source and someone connected with Paris’ family tells TMZ they are convinced she’ll be back at Twin Towers in a few days because she will deteriorate again.
So I am sure there will be some breaking news of Paris having a panic attack, because according to her while she is in jail she feels like she in a cage….with profound statements like that, this BITCH just might be the Socrates of our time.
Fortunately for her, the BITCH is still in the medical clinic at Lynwood, not her solitary cell, and will reportedly still get her Xanax that she is addicted to. But I am sure as long as she keeps getting her drug of choice on time, she wont go through withdrawals and might actually make it to her freedom day of June 25th.
Leave it to Paris Hilton to spend more state money than any other inmate. Since she is pretending she has severe medical issues, she has to be kept in the special medical ward, which costs $1109.78 a day versus the normal costs of $99.64. Now if she really needed the medical assistance that badly while in jail, she would need it outside of jail as well. But we all know what Paris does when she is not in jail, and its not cry and not eat, its party and booze! And I must say, if she is medically this bad off, I don’t think daddy Hilton should be planning a release party in Las Vegas but instead needs to subsequently enroll her into a psychiatric ward. Because really, if she has to have this much medical aid to get through the jail visit she has serious other issues that need to be addressed. Mary Tiedemen, Director of the ACLU, whatever the hell that means, said this about the condition a prisoner needs to be in before getting into the medical ward:
Mary Tiedeman, who monitors jails for the ACLU, told the AP Hilton is being housed in an area usually reserved for high-security inmates or those with severe health problems: “I don’t know what her health issue is, but you have got to have a pretty intense medical or mental health problem to be in that part of the jail.”
And even Rick and Kathy Hilton gave a tidbit about their daughter’s “awful” stint in jail, stating:
“She’s very scared…..It’s tough in there. It’s cold.”
Out of everything to complain about, such as the fungi outbreak the jail has experienced, they complain about it being cold??? I am sorry, but if the worse thing you can complain about in jail is it being to cold, I think you are going to be okay. I highly doubt that is the main complaint of the normal peasant prisoners.
So fans of Paris…..is the BITCH really crazy and needs to medical attention or is she just faking?? Not that being one or the other makes it better, either she is crazy or a liar so which is it??? Let me know….
Talk about kicking a BITCH when they are down! It has just been reported that Paris no longer has an agent! Endeavor Talent Agency confirmed they no longer represented the ousted heiress, saying “Paris is no longer a client.”. Us magazine reports:
“There was a lot of tension between Paris and her agents for a while. Her legal messes have totally consumed her, and she was always a difficult client. The goal was to make her the Martha Stewart of her generation. It just didn’t work out that way.”
I guess she wasn’t able to book enough jobs from jail so they had to let the BITCH go! And isn’t it kind of an oxy moron to employ Paris Hilton and call yourself the Endeavor Talant Agency???
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