Christina Aguilera was on Ellen this week, and basically her boobies are bigger than ever. And while that is probably the highlight of this clip, the real gold is watching Ellen steal peeks of Christina’s supersized boobs. But who can blame her? Its hard not to stare! Bitch is working with some MAJOR tits!
Proud mama Christina Aguilera is on the cover of People this week, debuting the latest edition of her family, baby Max Liron. And she looks happy. And thats about all the interesting things I can say about these pics, because, new babies are boring, all they do is just lie there and they all look like little shriveled up raisins of people and to be frank, I really don’t like them. Not just Max, ALL babies, except for the awesome ones.
Okay, remember when I said everyone was pregnant?? Well know everyone is going to be going from being preggo, to having annoying infants! The first one to pop out her baby jr. was Nicole Richie, who had a little girl named Harlow. Yes, its name is really Harlow. People Magazine reports:
Harlow Winter Kate Madden was born Friday at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center and weighed 6 lbs., 7 oz.
“The beautiful healthy baby girl left the hospital with her ecstatic parents,” says the rep, who confirmed the birth to PEOPLE exclusively.
And the baby news isn’t over yet, because on Saturday, Christina Aguilera and her hubby, Jordan Bratman, delivered their baby as well:
“Christina and Jordan are proud to announce the birth of their son Max Liron Bratman. He is a beautiful, healthy baby boy!” a rep for the two parents confirmed. “Mom is resting and doing well!”
So congratulations to these two now non pregnant bitches!!! Now all we have to look forward to is seeing how quickly they rebound after the pregnancy. I say there is a 50/50 chance one ends up like BITCHney.
Pretty much everyone in the world can agree that pregnancy is the most disgusting thing ever. And amazingly, Christina Aguilera is making it look even worse by wearing ghoulish, caked on make up and a dress that is too short, too see through and much, much too tight.
That inside out bellybutton thing she has put on display by wrapping it in spandex is honestly the most disturbing thing I have seen. The bitch just needs to stay home, wear a muu muu and not emerge until that baby human is out of her body.
Hells to the nah on this one people, I am all for cute Mommy and Baby pictures or whatever, but I don’t wanna see your pregnant self all airbrushed and naked on the cover of a magazine. All it makes me think about is a baby is about to swim out of her vag, which is pretty freaking gross.
UPDATE: In case you didn’t throw up already, here is a pic I forgot to upload!
Literally days after I had a conversation about how she has definitely been outclassing BITCHney, this bitch goes and flashes her crotch while she is getting out of the car. And if a time ever called for wearing panties, its when you are preggo and wearing a short dress.
Note to pregnant bitches everywhere: Pantyhose do not replace panties!!!
Click the picture above to see the kinda NSFW pic of Christina’s vagina looking like its being strangled by tights.
So Halloween was last night, and as usual, the whore meter was off the charts, and with so many bitches dressing like skanks and midterms going on, I am just going to have to consolidate them all into one!
So here goes, Paris dressed up AGAIN, this time as a soldier type thing, which is funny, because she could take an entire army out by starting a herpes shingles outbreak. Then their is Heidi Klum, who was a kitty, and I think she nailed the appropriate degree of whore for a mother of three. Neil Patrick Harris dressed up as an insane crazy killer clown, and I like the throwback to the days of when Halloween was about scary costumes. Kate Beckinsale might have worn the most pleather I have ever seen in one place, at one time in my life, and the bitch really just looks like a fetish pornstar, and she brought her kid, who I think is a “saloon girl”, seriously. I don’t know WTF Christina Aguilera was, but it was pretty bad. She should have went with the pregnant nun if you ask me. Teri Hatcher made me vomit a little as that queen bitch from Alice in Wonderland. And finally, mega-failure BITCHney looked a complete mess, with way too much see through mesh. It kind of looks like if you filled hot pink zebra fishnets with butter, and then put RED shoes on with it to make sure it clashed extra well.
Here are the pics of Christina working the red carpet at the Emmy’s as well, and I think we can all agree that Christina has indefinitely won the fight against BITCHney.
Christina Aguilera and hubby Jordan Bratman were out and about showing off her baby bump and giant gazangas! And I don’t know about you but I really can’t freaking wait to see what this baby is going to look like, because there is a 50/50 chance that it could look like its hobbit-warlock dad, which in baby form would be terrifying!!! And I know you are not suppose to make fun of children, but if it looks even remotely like Bratman it’s game time BITCHES, because, well, I hate babies.
Paris Hilton might be the best friend ever, if you like friends who will publicly announce that you’re pregnant to a club full of people when you haven’t confirmed it yet. And thats exactly what the BITCH did to Xtina Aguilera, according to Us Magazine:
“Congratulations to the most beautiful pregnant woman in the world, you’re gorgeous,†Hilton, 26, said to the packed crowd, while Aguilera, 26 (whose video ‘Candy Man’ is up for Best Director at the MTV VMAs) sat nearby in uncomfortable silence.
All I can say is smooooth, or should I say, unsmooth-like-your-skanky-vay-jay-jay???
And lets all take a moment to LOL at Paris trying to look coy.
E! is confirming the pregnancy rumors that have been swirling around the singer for weeks now! No word on a due date, but if the rumors continue to be true Mrs. Aguilera is already a couple months into it, so maybe we can be expecting a mini Christina by the new year.
Especially with that fug monster right beside her! Anyone would look hot with him in the background, yeesh! But we cant hate on the BITCH, she seems super happy and looks super hot while they were celebrating hubby Jordan Bratman’s birthday.
Doesn’t this BITCH know we cant recognize her unless she has on red lipstick? For those of you confused by this picture, I edited her hooker makeup in, and you should be able to see the Christina Aguilera we are all used to.
Nothing too exciting going on here, other than looking orange and wearing tight dresses. Usually Christina can capture that old glam look, but here she just fail. Either way, she is still hotter than BITCHney Spears.
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